How to Make an Animal-Based Smoothie

Learn How to Make an Animal-Based Smoothie and why kale is one of the worst ingredients to add to smoothies!

So, to put it eloquently: Kale pretty much sucks. WAIT! Before you send me hate mail in my DMs, please allow me to briefly explain why kale is not a superfood. This cruciferous plant truly is NOT your bestie to be added in all-the-things in your kitchen, and can actually be quite dangerous to eat.

An emerald-green kale smoothie sure looks beautiful, vibrant, and healthy, right? Though lurking inside your shamrock shake are some pretty nasty properties that can affect your body on a negative level.

When Green Smoothies Go Bad

We may have always believed due to dietary misinformation that eating a ton of plants is good for us, when in fact the opposite might be quite true. Vegetables contain natural defense mechanisms to protect themselves from being eaten, since plants cannot run away from their predators. Though most of these chemicals won’t necessarily make you keel over on the spot when ingested, they can trigger problems like chronic inflammation, digestive distress, and autoimmunity (to name a few). 

Kale, the meanie greenie held for questioning, contains:

Oxalates (can contribute to kidney stones and mineral imbalance)

Tannins (contains digestive enzyme inhibitors and antinutrients)

Phytic acid (reduces absorption of vital minerals like zinc, potassium, magnesium)

Goitrogens (a well-known suppressor of thyroid function and trigger of metabolic disturbances).

YIKES!!

To learn more about an anti-inflammatory animal-based diet and how it is low in toxins, click here to access the Animal-Based hub!

Wait…Isn’t a Whole Food Meal Better than a Smoothie?

While chewing your food is preferable to optimize digestion, there are times in our modern life we require some liquid food. Some instances might be when you are on the go, or when you are already working with impaired digestion. Either of these circumstances can make mornings a difficult time to consume a full animal-style breaky of eggs, roasted butternut squash, and homemade animal-based sausage. Though we should strive for a balanced morning meal, I get that this isn’t always attainable…trust me!

Leaky gut is prominent, albeit reversible, and sometimes we need some help from the blender to break down food for our digestive tract first thing in the morning. A way to promote digestion, even when sipping on liquified food, is to chew each sip of your smoothie. This activates your salivary glands, beginning the digestive process before the smoothie even hits your tummy.

How to Make a Not-Creepy Smoothie

So how in the world do we make a smoothie without kale, spinach, or the spring mix in the back of the fridge that is starting to liquify? Easy my friend…just skip the green part and replace it with more low-toxin protein, fat, and fruit!

Enough chatter on my part…let’s get to the actual low-toxin smoothies, now, shall we?

How to Make an Animal-Based Smoothie (two ways)

HIGHER CARB ANIMAL-BASED SMOOTHIE

Serves 1

• 1 medium banana

• ½ large avocado

• 1 cup frozen organic mixed berries (or fruit of your choice like chopped papaya or pineapple)

• 1-2 raw or lightly cooked pastured egg yolks (skip the whites when raw, they can cause inflammation)

• 1-2 scoops collagen powder

• 1 ½ cups filtered water, unpasteurized milk (from goat, sheep, or A2 cow), or additive-free coconut milk

• 1 pinch microplastic-free sea salt, like Redmond brand *SAVE 10% on your first Redmond order with code: CAVEWOMAN

• Optional: 1 pinch Ceylon cinnamon and/or 1 Tbsp fresh mint

1. Add all ingredients to a high-speed blender.
2. Puree until smooth.
3. Pour into a tall glass, chew as you sip, and enjoy!

LOWER CARB ANIMAL-BASED SMOOTHIE

Serves 1

• 1 cup frozen zucchini slices (or 1 medium cucumber, peeled and seeded)

• 1 large avocado

• ½ cup frozen raspberries

• 1-2 raw or lightly cooked pastured egg yolks (skip the whites when raw, they can cause inflammation)

• 1-2 scoops collagen powder

• 1 ½ cups filtered water, unpasteurized milk (from goat, sheep, or A2 cow), or additive-free coconut milk

• 1 pinch microplastic-free sea salt, like Redmond brand

• Optional: 1 pinch Ceylon cinnamon and/or 1 Tbsp fresh mint

1. Add all ingredients to a high-speed blender.
2. Puree until smooth.
3. Pour into a tall glass, chew as you sip, and enjoy!

Want more delicious animal-based recipes? Take your pick from the blog archives!

Ready to get started on a KALE-FREE, animal-based diet and learn which foods are the least toxic?

Head here to download your free 3-day meal plan, including a list of the least toxic plants and the most nutrient rich foods!