Paleo Old Fashioned Virgin Mocktail (AIP, Keto, Whole30 options)

This Paleo Old Fashioned Virgin Mocktail is a simple, classic alcohol-free cocktail that is hangover-free! Keto, Whole30, & AIP options.

Hi, I’m Samantha and I’m a (recovering) alcoholic. (I know some of you responded, “Hi Samantha!” and I want you to know that the thought of that just warms my heart.)

Basically, I’m one of those (subjectively un-)fortunate people who have an allergy to booze and who’s brain and body like Jameson whisky so much that if I drink it I’ll probably end up living under a bridge, pushing a shopping cart around full of empty Pabst Blue Ribbon cans…begging you for money to buy more Jameson and PBR.

I fully embraced this flattering genetic feature of mine with my sincere sobriety journey getting Facebook-official in 2012. I’m a grateful recovering drunk, and life is much, much better now without a drop of “drank!”

I’m alive. Happy. A productive member of society. Sober AF.

What the heck is a mocktail, anyway?

Now that we’ve all held hands at the end of the meeting, mumbled the Lord’s prayer, and swung hands in a circle (I promise AA’s not a cult, because it works if you work it, so work it ‘cause you’re worth it…) let’s talk mocktails.

Instead of getting sauced by drinking too much booze and having to deal with nature’s way of telling us we overdid it via a killer hangover, a non-alcoholic beverage is a way to partake in something tasty without the negative side effects.

Though it does not sound like a big deal to avoid drinking while others around you are inclined to imbibe, it is just more fun to have a mocktail instead of a boring bottle of water.

One of my fav comics would love this Paleo Old Fashioned Virgin Mocktail

As comedian and recovering addict John Mulaney could tell you, you want to be the life of the party and not the person who is ruining the party. A mocktail is a great way to ensure you are participating in the fun but still able to drive yourself home.

I’m grateful to my blogger bestie, Amanda of Unrefined Junkie who asked me how I would make an Old Fashioned alcohol-free. Thanks to her, the idea for this refreshing drink came to life! Here is a great dragon fruit margarita mocktail recipe by her if you are in the mood for a tequila-free version that requires no siesta (or a stint in the local county jail) afterward.

Much cleaner ingredients = no hangover

The other good news with this libation is that it is far cleaner than your typical Old Fashioned. You won’t find it sweetened and thickened with a bunch of goop that will wreak havoc on your digestive system.

There are some people who can do alcohol in moderation, but those who can’t are sure to benefit from a beverage that is comprised of easily digestible ingredients such as:

• A dark, earthy base liquid thanks to caffeine-free Honeybush Tea
  
  
• A hint of spice and herbal flavor from either Digestive Bitters OR Alcohol-Free Digestive Bitters
  
  
• A touch of sweetness with either maple syrup, orange juice, or Homemade Monk Fruit Liquid Drops
  
  
• A twist of orange – because that some fancy sh*t right there
  
  
• Ice, ice, baby (dun dun dun dun dun dun dun)

Raise your glass with this easy Paleo Old Fashioned Virgin Mocktail!

NOTE to my fellow survivors: If you find that the thought of even a virgin drink is too triggering, then don’t chance it! Stick to seltzer or your safe choice instead and be happy that you’re where you are today and that you’re thriving. I know some people who just the clink of ice in the cocktail glass, the color of the liquid, and similar underlying flavors may trigger a relapse. If this is you, it’s PERFECTLY OKAY to avoid mocktails like the plague, honey. Simply enjoy some coffee, tea, or whatever is a safe choice for you instead. You go on about your sober happy life the way you need to. Screw peer pressure, amiright or amiright?

If you or someone you know has a drinking problem, be sure to check out your local AA chapter and get the help you need for a happy, clean, and sober life. It’s possible, I promise! If I could do it, you can too, hun.

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

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5 from 1 vote

Paleo Old Fashioned Virgin Mocktail (AIP, Keto, Whole30 options)

This Paleo Old Fashioned Virgin Mocktail is a simple, classic alcohol-free cocktail that is hangover-free! Keto, Whole30, & AIP options.

Course Drinks

Keyword aip, allergy friendly, autoimmune protocol, dairy free, gluten free, keto, low carb, paleo, whole30

Ingredients

• 6 oz boiling water
• 1 bag honeybush tea
• 2” peel of orange
• ⅛ tsp digestive bitters (add extra orange peel for AIP or Whole30; use alcohol-free bitters if you are sensitive to alcohol)
• 1 tsp maple syrup (sub monk fruit for Keto; add a squeeze of the orange for Whole30)
• Ice cubes, to fill
• 1 frozen black cherry (optional)

Instructions

• Add the tea bag to a heat-proof mug, then pour the boiling water over the top.
• Allow the tea to come to room temperature while keeping the bag inside the mug.
• Squeeze then discard the tea bag.
• Pour cooled tea into a 12 oz rocks glass. Twist the orange peel over the glass so that the tea catches any oil that spritzes out of the peel, then drop the peel into the glass.
• Add the bitters and maple syrup and stir until combined.
• Add ice to fill and garnish with a frozen cherry if desired. Enjoy!

Notes

GOODIES USED IN THIS RECIPE:

Honeybush Tea

For Paleo: Digestive Bitters

For Whole30: Alcohol-Free Digestive Bitters

For Keto: Homemade Monk Fruit Liquid Drops